Posted on by Phil

My Learnings from The Book of Joy

This past summer a good friend of mine bought me a copy of “The Book of Joy.”  In the last year I’d been getting into meditation/spirituality, and his wife had loved it.

While the book isn’t very long, it did take me a long time to read it for the simple reason that there is SO MUCH wisdom sprinkled throughout.   For those that don’t know, this book is basically a summary of a week of conversation between the Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu.  It outlines many of their core philosophies.

There are a ton of great tidbits in this book for anyone with an open mind, and I highly suggest you go buy it if you’re at all curious.

I knew it’d be a worthwhile exercise for my own self to codify some (I can’t stress ‘some’ enough – this book is full of interesting and useful wisdom) of the key lessons that I took away, and thought “why not write them up on that blog I never post to!”

So, here are a few of the lessons I took away:

  • “The purpose of life is to find happiness” – The Dalai Lama says this in the opening part of the week, and I completely agree.  Of course, finding and pursuing happiness are quite different and will lead to divergent outcomes.  As is mentioned later in the book, happiness is a byproduct of generosity, compassion, self love, and a host of other worthy pursuits.  Pursuing it directly usually ends in distraction and a focus on things like fast cars or big boats.
  • Compassion = Happiness – Do you ever have one of those days where you strike up a genuine conversation with a stranger, or get to help out someone in need?  As the book says “If you develop a strong sense of concern for the well-being of others, this will make you happy in the morning, even before coffee.”  This is very true, and you can lean test it by smiling and saying hello to each person you meet with today – I guarantee you’ll notice the change in yourself.  Of course, you can supercharge your effort through generosity.
  • A grateful mind breeds happiness – Having a bad day?  Think of something you’re truly grateful for and focus on it.  Maybe it’s as trivial as how warm your coffee is, or maybe it’s something as important as your health.  Focusing on things we’re grateful for is transformative, and a worthwhile daily practice.
  • We’re all people – This is very related to the compassion point, but I wanted to write down a key consideration made throughout the book around the negative side of personal interactions.  Ever have a boss that is horrible, or have a run in with a bully?  Realistically, these people are critical because they see the world as critical, or aggressive because they are fragile.  Forgiveness and empathy, even to people who “don’t deserve it” leads to happiness.  Side note: I’ll admit it, I can hold grudges…but letting them go feels so much better than ruminating (with the exception of when I’m trying to beat a 3 mile time and need some extra adrenaline for that final push).
  • Stress and hardship are just a part of life – According to the book, stress is actually key to our development in utero (disclaimer:  I’m no doctor).  We can all agree that it’d be crazy not to recognize the amazing role that hardship and failure play in the evolution of us as individuals.  So, try to see the bright side of your next challenge, and realize that every human on earth has to go through something similar in their lives (easier said that done!).  Apparently, the first noble truth of Buddhism is that life is full of suffering.  If you need some extra inspiration here, I highly recommend Viktor Frankel’s Man’s Search for Meaning.
  • It ain’t all fluff  – A lot of the above sounds like something a non analytical thinker would believe in, or what you may simply learn at Kindergarten (and what’s wrong with that???).  However, nothing could be further from the truth.  Following the teachings laid out in this book will actually make you happier, allow you to think clearer, and live a more “productive” life.  Beyond my own experience,  you can see that these teachings align with how humans came to be through the evolution of our species.  For example, building meaningful relationships with others is a sure fire way to be happy, which makes sense as that’s how we used to (and still do) get stuff done in society.  In fact, the book is sprinkled with actual scientific studies that detail things like lowered hypertension in people who gave away money…just in case you’re a skeptic and need some data along with the wise words 🙂

One fun thought experiment is to think about the various things future generations will know as truth that we can’t see right now.  For example, we now look back at history and think “how could they not know smoking was bad for them?” or “how could anyone not see the CDO market was a house of cards that posed a major systemic risk to the economy?”  Meditation is a great way to think more clearly about the question of what we just aren’t understanding now…and, perhaps its future adoption will be another answer to this thought experiment.

8,699 Replies to “My Learnings from The Book of Joy”

  2. I am curious to find out what blog system you happen to be using?
    I’m having some minor security issues with my latest blog and
    I would like to find something more secure. Do
    you have any suggestions?

  3. Howdy! This is my 1st comment here so I just wanted to
    give a quick shout out and tell you I genuinely enjoy reading through your posts.
    Can you recommend any other blogs/websites/forums that deal with the same topics?
    Appreciate it!

  7. Pretty section of content. I just stumbled upon your weblog and in accession capital
    to assert that I get in fact enjoyed account your blog posts.

    Any way I will be subscribing to your feeds and even I
    achievement you access consistently quickly.

  8. Thanks for another informative blog. The place else
    may just I get that kind of info written in such a perfect means?

    I have a project that I am simply now working
    on, and I’ve been on the glance out for such info.

  10. Do you mind if I quote a couple of your posts as long as I
    provide credit and sources back to your blog? My blog is in the very same area of interest as yours
    and my visitors would truly benefit from a lot of the information you provide here.
    Please let me know if this okay with you. Appreciate it!

  11. Thanks for ones marvelous posting! I genuinely enjoyed reading it,
    you may be a great author.I will ensure that I bookmark your blog and will eventually come back
    in the future. I want to encourage you continue your great job, have a nice
    evening!

  13. You have made some decent points there. I looked on the net to learn more about the issue and found most people
    will go along with your views on this web site.

  15. Hi there are using WordPress for your site platform? I’m new
    to the blog world but I’m trying to get started and
    set up my own. Do you require any html coding knowledge to make your own blog?
    Any help would be greatly appreciated!

  19. Hi! Do you use Twitter? I’d like to follow you if that would be ok.

    I’m undoubtedly enjoying your blog and look forward to new updates.

  20. It’s amazing to pay a quick visit this site and reading the
    views of all mates concerning this post, while I am also keen of getting
    knowledge.

  21. Interesting blog! Is your theme custom made or did you
    download it from somewhere? A design like yours with
    a few simple adjustements would really make my blog shine.
    Please let me know where you got your theme. Many thanks

  24. I simply could not depart your web site before suggesting that I
    extremely enjoyed the usual information a person supply on your guests?

    Is going to be back ceaselessly to inspect new
    posts

  25. If you would like to grow your familiarity simply keep visiting
    this website and be updated with the most up-to-date gossip posted here.

  27. Normally I do not learn post on blogs, however I would like to say that this write-up very pressured me to take a look at and do so!
    Your writing style has been amazed me. Thanks, quite nice post.

  32. Heya i am for the primary time here. I came across this board and I find
    It really helpful & it helped me out much. I’m hoping to present one thing again and help others like you helped me.

  33. Pretty element of content. I simply stumbled upon your site and in accession capital to say that I get in fact loved account your
    weblog posts. Anyway I’ll be subscribing for your feeds or even I fulfillment you get entry
    to persistently quickly.

  36. I’ve learn several just right stuff here. Definitely value bookmarking for revisiting.
    I surprise how much attempt you place to make this kind of wonderful
    informative site.

  37. This is very interesting, You’re a very skilled blogger. I’ve
    joined your feed and look forward to seeking more of
    your magnificent post. Also, I have shared your site in my social networks!

  41. First off I would like to say excellent blog!

    I had a quick question in which I’d like to ask if you don’t
    mind. I was curious to know how you center yourself and clear your mind prior to writing.
    I’ve had trouble clearing my mind in getting my thoughts out there.
    I truly do enjoy writing but it just seems like the first 10 to
    15 minutes are wasted just trying to figure out
    how to begin. Any recommendations or hints? Thank you!

  42. Fantastic beat ! I would like to apprentice while you
    amend your website, how could i subscribe for a blog website?
    The account helped me a acceptable deal. I had been a little bit acquainted
    of this your broadcast offered bright clear idea

  43. I don’t even know how I ended up here, but I thought this post
    was good. I do not know who you are but certainly you’re going
    to a famous blogger if you are not already 😉 Cheers!

  44. Do you have a spam problem on this blog; I also am a blogger, and I was wondering your situation; we have created some nice methods and we
    are looking to swap methods with others, be sure to
    shoot me an email if interested.

  45. I was wondering if you ever considered changing the page layout of your
    site? Its very well written; I love what youve got to say.
    But maybe you could a little more in the way of content so people could connect
    with it better. Youve got an awful lot of text for
    only having one or two pictures. Maybe you could space it out better?

  46. Hey there, You’ve done a fantastic job. I will certainly digg it and personally
    suggest to my friends. I’m confident they’ll be benefited
    from this web site.

Comments are closed.