Posted on by Phil

My Learnings from The Book of Joy

This past summer a good friend of mine bought me a copy of “The Book of Joy.”  In the last year I’d been getting into meditation/spirituality, and his wife had loved it.

While the book isn’t very long, it did take me a long time to read it for the simple reason that there is SO MUCH wisdom sprinkled throughout.   For those that don’t know, this book is basically a summary of a week of conversation between the Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu.  It outlines many of their core philosophies.

There are a ton of great tidbits in this book for anyone with an open mind, and I highly suggest you go buy it if you’re at all curious.

I knew it’d be a worthwhile exercise for my own self to codify some (I can’t stress ‘some’ enough – this book is full of interesting and useful wisdom) of the key lessons that I took away, and thought “why not write them up on that blog I never post to!”

So, here are a few of the lessons I took away:

  • “The purpose of life is to find happiness” – The Dalai Lama says this in the opening part of the week, and I completely agree.  Of course, finding and pursuing happiness are quite different and will lead to divergent outcomes.  As is mentioned later in the book, happiness is a byproduct of generosity, compassion, self love, and a host of other worthy pursuits.  Pursuing it directly usually ends in distraction and a focus on things like fast cars or big boats.
  • Compassion = Happiness – Do you ever have one of those days where you strike up a genuine conversation with a stranger, or get to help out someone in need?  As the book says “If you develop a strong sense of concern for the well-being of others, this will make you happy in the morning, even before coffee.”  This is very true, and you can lean test it by smiling and saying hello to each person you meet with today – I guarantee you’ll notice the change in yourself.  Of course, you can supercharge your effort through generosity.
  • A grateful mind breeds happiness – Having a bad day?  Think of something you’re truly grateful for and focus on it.  Maybe it’s as trivial as how warm your coffee is, or maybe it’s something as important as your health.  Focusing on things we’re grateful for is transformative, and a worthwhile daily practice.
  • We’re all people – This is very related to the compassion point, but I wanted to write down a key consideration made throughout the book around the negative side of personal interactions.  Ever have a boss that is horrible, or have a run in with a bully?  Realistically, these people are critical because they see the world as critical, or aggressive because they are fragile.  Forgiveness and empathy, even to people who “don’t deserve it” leads to happiness.  Side note: I’ll admit it, I can hold grudges…but letting them go feels so much better than ruminating (with the exception of when I’m trying to beat a 3 mile time and need some extra adrenaline for that final push).
  • Stress and hardship are just a part of life – According to the book, stress is actually key to our development in utero (disclaimer:  I’m no doctor).  We can all agree that it’d be crazy not to recognize the amazing role that hardship and failure play in the evolution of us as individuals.  So, try to see the bright side of your next challenge, and realize that every human on earth has to go through something similar in their lives (easier said that done!).  Apparently, the first noble truth of Buddhism is that life is full of suffering.  If you need some extra inspiration here, I highly recommend Viktor Frankel’s Man’s Search for Meaning.
  • It ain’t all fluff  – A lot of the above sounds like something a non analytical thinker would believe in, or what you may simply learn at Kindergarten (and what’s wrong with that???).  However, nothing could be further from the truth.  Following the teachings laid out in this book will actually make you happier, allow you to think clearer, and live a more “productive” life.  Beyond my own experience,  you can see that these teachings align with how humans came to be through the evolution of our species.  For example, building meaningful relationships with others is a sure fire way to be happy, which makes sense as that’s how we used to (and still do) get stuff done in society.  In fact, the book is sprinkled with actual scientific studies that detail things like lowered hypertension in people who gave away money…just in case you’re a skeptic and need some data along with the wise words 🙂

One fun thought experiment is to think about the various things future generations will know as truth that we can’t see right now.  For example, we now look back at history and think “how could they not know smoking was bad for them?” or “how could anyone not see the CDO market was a house of cards that posed a major systemic risk to the economy?”  Meditation is a great way to think more clearly about the question of what we just aren’t understanding now…and, perhaps its future adoption will be another answer to this thought experiment.

8,699 Replies to “My Learnings from The Book of Joy”

  1. Awesome blog! Is your theme custom made or did you download it from somewhere?

    A theme like yours with a few simple tweeks would really make my blog stand out.
    Please let me know where you got your design. Thank you

  2. We absolutely love your blog and find nearly all of your post’s to be just what I’m looking
    for. Do you offer guest writers to write content for you personally?
    I wouldn’t mind producing a post or elaborating on some of the subjects you write in relation to here.
    Again, awesome web site!

  3. Hi! I could have sworn I’ve been to this website before but after
    browsing through some of the post I realized it’s new to me.
    Anyways, I’m definitely glad I found it and I’ll be bookmarking and checking back frequently!

  4. I was suggested this blog by means of my cousin. I’m not sure whether
    or not this submit is written by means of him as nobody else
    recognize such particular about my trouble. You are wonderful!
    Thanks!

  6. I am curious to find out what blog system you’re working with?
    I’m having some small security problems with my latest website
    and I would like to find something more safe. Do you have any suggestions?

  8. We’re a bunch of volunteers and opening a new scheme in our community.
    Your website offered us with useful information to work on. You’ve performed a formidable
    job and our whole group will likely be thankful to you.

  11. Hey very nice web site!! Guy .. Beautiful .. Amazing .. I will
    bookmark your blog and take the feeds additionally?
    I am happy to seek out a lot of helpful information here within the post, we want develop extra techniques in this regard, thank you for sharing.
    . . . . .

  12. I’ve been surfing on-line more than three hours nowadays, yet I never discovered any
    interesting article like yours. It’s lovely worth enough for me.
    Personally, if all site owners and bloggers
    made excellent content material as you did, the web
    will likely be a lot more helpful than ever before.

  14. Greetings from Los angeles! I’m bored to death at work so I decided to browse your
    website on my iphone during lunch break. I love the knowledge you provide here
    and can’t wait to take a look when I get home.
    I’m shocked at how fast your blog loaded on my phone ..
    I’m not even using WIFI, just 3G .. Anyways, awesome blog!

  16. Can I simply just say what a comfort to discover someone who really understands what they are discussing over the internet.
    You definitely know how to bring an issue to light and make it important.
    More and more people have to check this out and understand this side of your story.

    I can’t believe you are not more popular given that you most certainly have the gift.

  17. I don’t even understand how I stopped up here, but I believed this submit used to be great.
    I do not recognise who you are however certainly you are going to
    a famous blogger if you are not already. Cheers!

  18. It’s really a cool and helpful piece of info. I’m satisfied that you just
    shared this helpful information with us. Please
    stay us up to date like this. Thanks for sharing.

  19. Hello, i think that i saw you visited my website thus i came to
    “return the favor”.I am attempting to find things to enhance my website!I suppose its ok to use a few of your ideas!!

  21. Attractive section of content. I just stumbled upon your
    website and in accession capital to assert that
    I acquire actually enjoyed account your blog posts.
    Anyway I’ll be subscribing to your augment and
    even I achievement you access consistently quickly.

  22. Greetings from Colorado! I’m bored to tears at work so I decided to check out your blog on my
    iphone during lunch break. I really like the knowledge you
    present here and can’t wait to take a look when I get home.

    I’m surprised at how quick your blog loaded on my mobile ..
    I’m not even using WIFI, just 3G .. Anyways, great site!

  24. Fantastic website you have here but I was wanting to know if
    you knew of any message boards that cover the same topics
    discussed in this article? I’d really like to be a part of community where I can get feedback from
    other knowledgeable people that share the same interest.
    If you have any suggestions, please let me know.
    Bless you!

  25. With havin so much written content do you ever run into any issues of plagorism
    or copyright violation? My website has a lot of completely unique content I’ve
    either authored myself or outsourced but it seems a lot of it is popping it up all over the web without my agreement.
    Do you know any methods to help reduce content from being ripped off?
    I’d certainly appreciate it.

  27. Greetings from California! I’m bored at work so I decided to
    check out your site on my iphone during lunch break.
    I really like the info you provide here and can’t wait to take a look
    when I get home. I’m surprised at how fast
    your blog loaded on my mobile .. I’m not even using WIFI, just 3G ..

    Anyways, fantastic site!

  32. Wow that was strange. I just wrote an extremely long comment but after I clicked submit my comment didn’t show
    up. Grrrr… well I’m not writing all that over again. Anyhow, just wanted to say superb blog!

  34. I just couldn’t depart your website prior to suggesting that I extremely loved the standard information an individual provide
    for your guests? Is gonna be again continuously to investigate cross-check new posts

  35. Heya! I just wanted to ask if you ever have any issues with hackers?
    My last blog (wordpress) was hacked and I ended up losing months of hard work
    due to no backup. Do you have any solutions to prevent hackers?

  38. Hello There. I found your blog using msn. This is a
    really well written article. I will make sure to bookmark it and return to read more of your useful information. Thanks for the post.
    I’ll definitely comeback.

  39. Superb blog! Do you have any hints for aspiring writers?
    I’m hoping to start my own website soon but I’m a little lost
    on everything. Would you propose starting with a free
    platform like WordPress or go for a paid option? There are so many
    options out there that I’m totally confused .. Any suggestions?
    Cheers!

  40. I was recommended this web site by my cousin. I’m not sure whether this post
    is written by him as no one else know such detailed about
    my problem. You’re amazing! Thanks!

  42. naturally like your web-site but you have to test the spelling on quite
    a few of your posts. Many of them are rife with spelling problems
    and I to find it very bothersome to tell the reality then again I will surely
    come back again.

  43. I like the valuable info you provide in your articles.

    I’ll bookmark your blog and check again here frequently.
    I am quite sure I’ll learn lots of new stuff right here!
    Best of luck for the next!

  44. I know this if off topic but I’m looking into starting
    my own weblog and was curious what all is needed to get set up?

    I’m assuming having a blog like yours would cost
    a pretty penny? I’m not very internet savvy so I’m not 100% sure.
    Any tips or advice would be greatly appreciated.

    Thanks

  45. You actually make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find
    this topic to be really something that I think I would never understand.
    It seems too complex and very broad for me. I’m looking forward for your next post, I’ll
    try to get the hang of it!

  47. I like the valuable info you provide in your articles.
    I’ll bookmark your blog and check again here regularly.
    I’m quite certain I’ll learn many new stuff right here!
    Best of luck for the next!

  48. Someone necessarily help to make critically articles I might
    state. This is the very first time I frequented your website page and up to now?
    I amazed with the research you made to make this actual submit extraordinary.
    Fantastic job!

  49. Your style is so unique in comparison to other folks I have read
    stuff from. Many thanks for posting when you’ve got the opportunity, Guess
    I will just bookmark this page.

  50. I’ll immediately seize your rss as I can’t in finding your e-mail subscription hyperlink or e-newsletter service.
    Do you’ve any? Please allow me recognize in order that I may just subscribe.

    Thanks.

Comments are closed.