Posted on by Phil

My Learnings from The Book of Joy

This past summer a good friend of mine bought me a copy of “The Book of Joy.”  In the last year I’d been getting into meditation/spirituality, and his wife had loved it.

While the book isn’t very long, it did take me a long time to read it for the simple reason that there is SO MUCH wisdom sprinkled throughout.   For those that don’t know, this book is basically a summary of a week of conversation between the Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu.  It outlines many of their core philosophies.

There are a ton of great tidbits in this book for anyone with an open mind, and I highly suggest you go buy it if you’re at all curious.

I knew it’d be a worthwhile exercise for my own self to codify some (I can’t stress ‘some’ enough – this book is full of interesting and useful wisdom) of the key lessons that I took away, and thought “why not write them up on that blog I never post to!”

So, here are a few of the lessons I took away:

  • “The purpose of life is to find happiness” – The Dalai Lama says this in the opening part of the week, and I completely agree.  Of course, finding and pursuing happiness are quite different and will lead to divergent outcomes.  As is mentioned later in the book, happiness is a byproduct of generosity, compassion, self love, and a host of other worthy pursuits.  Pursuing it directly usually ends in distraction and a focus on things like fast cars or big boats.
  • Compassion = Happiness – Do you ever have one of those days where you strike up a genuine conversation with a stranger, or get to help out someone in need?  As the book says “If you develop a strong sense of concern for the well-being of others, this will make you happy in the morning, even before coffee.”  This is very true, and you can lean test it by smiling and saying hello to each person you meet with today – I guarantee you’ll notice the change in yourself.  Of course, you can supercharge your effort through generosity.
  • A grateful mind breeds happiness – Having a bad day?  Think of something you’re truly grateful for and focus on it.  Maybe it’s as trivial as how warm your coffee is, or maybe it’s something as important as your health.  Focusing on things we’re grateful for is transformative, and a worthwhile daily practice.
  • We’re all people – This is very related to the compassion point, but I wanted to write down a key consideration made throughout the book around the negative side of personal interactions.  Ever have a boss that is horrible, or have a run in with a bully?  Realistically, these people are critical because they see the world as critical, or aggressive because they are fragile.  Forgiveness and empathy, even to people who “don’t deserve it” leads to happiness.  Side note: I’ll admit it, I can hold grudges…but letting them go feels so much better than ruminating (with the exception of when I’m trying to beat a 3 mile time and need some extra adrenaline for that final push).
  • Stress and hardship are just a part of life – According to the book, stress is actually key to our development in utero (disclaimer:  I’m no doctor).  We can all agree that it’d be crazy not to recognize the amazing role that hardship and failure play in the evolution of us as individuals.  So, try to see the bright side of your next challenge, and realize that every human on earth has to go through something similar in their lives (easier said that done!).  Apparently, the first noble truth of Buddhism is that life is full of suffering.  If you need some extra inspiration here, I highly recommend Viktor Frankel’s Man’s Search for Meaning.
  • It ain’t all fluff  – A lot of the above sounds like something a non analytical thinker would believe in, or what you may simply learn at Kindergarten (and what’s wrong with that???).  However, nothing could be further from the truth.  Following the teachings laid out in this book will actually make you happier, allow you to think clearer, and live a more “productive” life.  Beyond my own experience,  you can see that these teachings align with how humans came to be through the evolution of our species.  For example, building meaningful relationships with others is a sure fire way to be happy, which makes sense as that’s how we used to (and still do) get stuff done in society.  In fact, the book is sprinkled with actual scientific studies that detail things like lowered hypertension in people who gave away money…just in case you’re a skeptic and need some data along with the wise words 🙂

One fun thought experiment is to think about the various things future generations will know as truth that we can’t see right now.  For example, we now look back at history and think “how could they not know smoking was bad for them?” or “how could anyone not see the CDO market was a house of cards that posed a major systemic risk to the economy?”  Meditation is a great way to think more clearly about the question of what we just aren’t understanding now…and, perhaps its future adoption will be another answer to this thought experiment.

8,699 Replies to “My Learnings from The Book of Joy”

  5. Simply desire to say your article is as amazing.

    The clearness in your post is simply excellent and
    i can assume you’re an expert on this subject.
    Well with your permission allow me to grab your RSS feed to keep updated with forthcoming post.

    Thanks a million and please continue the rewarding
    work.

  6. You are so cool! I don’t suppose I have read anything like that before.
    So great to find another person with a few unique thoughts on this topic.

    Seriously.. many thanks for starting this up. This website is one thing that is required on the web,
    someone with a little originality!

  7. Nice blog here! Also your website a lot up very fast!
    What host are you the use of? Can I get your affiliate link
    to your host? I desire my site loaded up as fast as yours lol

  8. Hello! Do you know if they make any plugins to protect
    against hackers? I’m kinda paranoid about losing everything I’ve worked hard on. Any suggestions?

  10. Someone necessarily lend a hand to make seriously articles I might
    state. This is the first time I frequented your web page and to this point?
    I amazed with the research you made to make this actual publish
    incredible. Wonderful task!

  11. Hmm is anyone else experiencing problems with the images on this blog loading?
    I’m trying to determine if its a problem on my end or if it’s the blog.
    Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.

  13. It’s truly a nice and helpful piece of information. I’m glad
    that you just shared this useful info with us.
    Please keep us informed like this. Thank you for sharing.

  14. I think this is one of the most vital information for me.
    And i am glad reading your article. But want to remark on some general
    things, The site style is ideal, the articles is really nice :
    D. Good job, cheers

  18. We are a bunch of volunteers and starting a brand new scheme in our community.

    Your site provided us with valuable info to work on.
    You have done an impressive activity and our whole group can be grateful to you.

  19. With havin so much written content do you ever run into any problems of
    plagorism or copyright violation? My blog has a lot of unique content I’ve either authored myself or outsourced but it seems a lot of it is popping it
    up all over the internet without my agreement.
    Do you know any methods to help stop content from being ripped off?
    I’d truly appreciate it.

  21. Do you have a spam problem on this site; I also am a blogger, and I was wanting
    to know your situation; many of us have created some nice methods and we are
    looking to swap solutions with others, why not shoot me an email if interested.

  22. My brother recommended I may like this website. He was totally right.
    This put up truly made my day. You cann’t consider simply how a lot time I
    had spent for this info! Thanks!

  23. I’m not sure why but this web site is loading extremely slow
    for me. Is anyone else having this issue or is it a issue on my end?
    I’ll check back later on and see if the problem still exists.

  28. Sweet blog! I found it while surfing around on Yahoo News.
    Do you have any tips on how to get listed in Yahoo News?

    I’ve been trying for a while but I never seem to get there!

    Appreciate it

  31. Excellent goods from you, man. I have understand your stuff previous
    to and you are just extremely great. I actually like what
    you have acquired here, certainly like what you’re stating and the
    way in which you say it. You make it enjoyable and you still
    care for to keep it wise. I can not wait to read
    much more from you. This is actually a wonderful site.

  35. Hi there, i read your blog from time to time
    and i own a similar one and i was just curious if you
    get a lot of spam comments? If so how do you reduce it, any plugin or anything you can suggest?
    I get so much lately it’s driving me insane so any help is very much appreciated.

  37. I simply couldn’t leave your website prior to suggesting
    that I extremely enjoyed the standard info a person provide
    on your visitors? Is gonna be again incessantly in order to investigate
    cross-check new posts

  38. Can I simply just say what a comfort to find somebody who actually understands what
    they’re discussing on the internet. You definitely know how
    to bring an issue to light and make it important. More people ought to look at this and understand this side of your
    story. I was surprised that you aren’t more
    popular given that you most certainly possess the gift.

  41. Thanks for your marvelous posting! I quite enjoyed reading it,
    you are a great author.I will make certain to bookmark your blog
    and definitely will come back someday. I want
    to encourage you continue your great work, have a nice evening!

  44. After looking over a handful of the articles on your web page,
    I seriously appreciate your technique of writing a blog. I saved
    as a favorite it to my bookmark website list and will be checking back soon. Please visit my website too and let me know
    your opinion.

  45. I do consider all the ideas you have offered for your post.
    They are really convincing and can certainly work. Still, the posts are very brief for beginners.
    May just you please prolong them a bit from next time? Thanks for the
    post.

  46. Hi! I just wanted to ask if you ever have any issues
    with hackers? My last blog (wordpress) was hacked and I ended up losing months of hard work
    due to no backup. Do you have any solutions to protect against hackers?

  47. Heya i’m for the primary time here. I came across this
    board and I in finding It really useful & it helped me
    out much. I am hoping to give something again and help others such as you helped me.

  48. Howdy! This post couldn’t be written any better! Looking through this article reminds me of my previous roommate!

    He continually kept talking about this. I am going to send this post to him.
    Pretty sure he will have a great read. Thanks for sharing!

  50. Oh my goodness! Amazing article dude! Thank you, However I am having troubles with your RSS.
    I don’t know the reason why I can’t subscribe to it.
    Is there anyone else getting similar RSS issues? Anyone that
    knows the solution can you kindly respond?
    Thanks!!

Comments are closed.