Posted on by Phil

My Learnings from The Book of Joy

This past summer a good friend of mine bought me a copy of “The Book of Joy.”  In the last year I’d been getting into meditation/spirituality, and his wife had loved it.

While the book isn’t very long, it did take me a long time to read it for the simple reason that there is SO MUCH wisdom sprinkled throughout.   For those that don’t know, this book is basically a summary of a week of conversation between the Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu.  It outlines many of their core philosophies.

There are a ton of great tidbits in this book for anyone with an open mind, and I highly suggest you go buy it if you’re at all curious.

I knew it’d be a worthwhile exercise for my own self to codify some (I can’t stress ‘some’ enough – this book is full of interesting and useful wisdom) of the key lessons that I took away, and thought “why not write them up on that blog I never post to!”

So, here are a few of the lessons I took away:

  • “The purpose of life is to find happiness” – The Dalai Lama says this in the opening part of the week, and I completely agree.  Of course, finding and pursuing happiness are quite different and will lead to divergent outcomes.  As is mentioned later in the book, happiness is a byproduct of generosity, compassion, self love, and a host of other worthy pursuits.  Pursuing it directly usually ends in distraction and a focus on things like fast cars or big boats.
  • Compassion = Happiness – Do you ever have one of those days where you strike up a genuine conversation with a stranger, or get to help out someone in need?  As the book says “If you develop a strong sense of concern for the well-being of others, this will make you happy in the morning, even before coffee.”  This is very true, and you can lean test it by smiling and saying hello to each person you meet with today – I guarantee you’ll notice the change in yourself.  Of course, you can supercharge your effort through generosity.
  • A grateful mind breeds happiness – Having a bad day?  Think of something you’re truly grateful for and focus on it.  Maybe it’s as trivial as how warm your coffee is, or maybe it’s something as important as your health.  Focusing on things we’re grateful for is transformative, and a worthwhile daily practice.
  • We’re all people – This is very related to the compassion point, but I wanted to write down a key consideration made throughout the book around the negative side of personal interactions.  Ever have a boss that is horrible, or have a run in with a bully?  Realistically, these people are critical because they see the world as critical, or aggressive because they are fragile.  Forgiveness and empathy, even to people who “don’t deserve it” leads to happiness.  Side note: I’ll admit it, I can hold grudges…but letting them go feels so much better than ruminating (with the exception of when I’m trying to beat a 3 mile time and need some extra adrenaline for that final push).
  • Stress and hardship are just a part of life – According to the book, stress is actually key to our development in utero (disclaimer:  I’m no doctor).  We can all agree that it’d be crazy not to recognize the amazing role that hardship and failure play in the evolution of us as individuals.  So, try to see the bright side of your next challenge, and realize that every human on earth has to go through something similar in their lives (easier said that done!).  Apparently, the first noble truth of Buddhism is that life is full of suffering.  If you need some extra inspiration here, I highly recommend Viktor Frankel’s Man’s Search for Meaning.
  • It ain’t all fluff  – A lot of the above sounds like something a non analytical thinker would believe in, or what you may simply learn at Kindergarten (and what’s wrong with that???).  However, nothing could be further from the truth.  Following the teachings laid out in this book will actually make you happier, allow you to think clearer, and live a more “productive” life.  Beyond my own experience,  you can see that these teachings align with how humans came to be through the evolution of our species.  For example, building meaningful relationships with others is a sure fire way to be happy, which makes sense as that’s how we used to (and still do) get stuff done in society.  In fact, the book is sprinkled with actual scientific studies that detail things like lowered hypertension in people who gave away money…just in case you’re a skeptic and need some data along with the wise words 🙂

One fun thought experiment is to think about the various things future generations will know as truth that we can’t see right now.  For example, we now look back at history and think “how could they not know smoking was bad for them?” or “how could anyone not see the CDO market was a house of cards that posed a major systemic risk to the economy?”  Meditation is a great way to think more clearly about the question of what we just aren’t understanding now…and, perhaps its future adoption will be another answer to this thought experiment.

8,699 Replies to “My Learnings from The Book of Joy”

  1. I used to be recommended this website through my cousin. I am no
    longer sure whether or not this post is written by means of
    him as nobody else understand such detailed about my problem.
    You are incredible! Thank you!

  3. I loved as much as you’ll receive carried out right here.
    The sketch is attractive, your authored subject matter stylish.
    nonetheless, you command get got an impatience over that you wish
    be delivering the following. unwell unquestionably come further formerly again as
    exactly the same nearly very often inside case
    you shield this hike.

  4. If some one wishes expert view on the topic of blogging then i suggest him/her to
    pay a quick visit this webpage, Keep up the fastidious job.

  5. My coder is trying to convince me to move to .net from PHP.
    I have always disliked the idea because of the costs.
    But he’s tryiong none the less. I’ve been using Movable-type on a variety of websites for
    about a year and am anxious about switching to another platform.
    I have heard excellent things about blogengine.net. Is
    there a way I can import all my wordpress posts into it?
    Any kind of help would be greatly appreciated!

  7. hi!,I like your writing very a lot! share we be
    in contact more approximately your article on AOL?

    I require an expert on this area to unravel my problem. Maybe that is you!
    Having a look ahead to see you.

  8. After I initially commented I appear to have clicked the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now each time a comment is added I get 4 emails with the exact same
    comment. There has to be a way you are able to remove me from that service?
    Kudos!

  9. I don’t even know how I ended up here, but I thought this post was
    good. I do not know who you are but definitely you are
    going to a famous blogger if you are not already 😉 Cheers!

  14. Hello, i read your blog from time to time and i own a similar one and
    i was just curious if you get a lot of spam feedback?
    If so how do you stop it, any plugin or anything you can suggest?
    I get so much lately it’s driving me mad so any help is very
    much appreciated.

  18. Hi there, i read your blog from time to time and i own a similar one and i was just curious if
    you get a lot of spam comments? If so how do you reduce it,
    any plugin or anything you can suggest? I get so much lately it’s driving me
    crazy so any help is very much appreciated.

  19. Hi just wanted to give you a brief heads up and let you know a few of the
    images aren’t loading properly. I’m not sure why but I think its a linking issue.
    I’ve tried it in two different internet browsers and both
    show the same outcome.

  21. It is appropriate time to make some plans for the future and it’s time to be
    happy. I have read this post and if I could I wish to suggest
    you some interesting things or tips. Perhaps you could write next articles referring to this article.
    I desire to read more things about it!

  22. Simply want to say your article is as astonishing.
    The clarity for your put up is simply excellent and i could
    think you are an expert on this subject. Fine together with your permission allow me to grab your feed to stay updated with impending post.
    Thank you 1,000,000 and please continue the gratifying work.

  23. My brother suggested I might like this web site. He was totally right.

    This post actually made my day. You can not imagine simply how much time I had spent for this info!
    Thanks!

  24. Excellent blog here! Also your website quite a bit up
    very fast! What web host are you the usage of? Can I get your affiliate link to your host?
    I desire my web site loaded up as quickly as yours lol

  25. Attractive element of content. I simply stumbled
    upon your web site and in accession capital to claim that I acquire actually enjoyed account your blog posts.
    Any way I’ll be subscribing to your augment and even I success you
    access constantly rapidly.

  28. Hello there! This blog post could not be written much better!
    Looking at this post reminds me of my previous roommate! He constantly kept talking about this.
    I am going to send this information to him. Fairly certain he’s going to have
    a great read. Many thanks for sharing!

  30. Thank you for the auspicious writeup. It in truth was once a leisure account it.
    Look advanced to far delivered agreeable from
    you! However, how could we keep up a correspondence?

  31. Good post. I learn something new and challenging on sites
    I stumbleupon everyday. It’s always useful to read through content from other authors
    and use something from other websites.

  32. Wow, wonderful weblog structure! How long have you ever been running a blog for?
    you made blogging glance easy. The overall look of your site is excellent, as neatly as the content!

  33. It’s the best time to make some plans for the future
    and it’s time to be happy. I’ve read this post and if I
    could I desire to suggest you some interesting things or advice.
    Maybe you can write next articles referring to this article.
    I wish to read more things about it!

  34. Do you have a spam problem on this site; I also am a blogger, and
    I was wondering your situation; many of us have created
    some nice methods and we are looking to trade solutions with other folks, be sure to shoot me an e-mail if interested.

  35. Excellent weblog here! Also your site quite a bit up very fast!
    What host are you using? Can I am getting your affiliate
    hyperlink in your host? I want my website loaded up as fast as yours lol

  36. Definitely imagine that that you stated. Your favourite justification appeared to be on the net the simplest factor to be mindful of.
    I say to you, I certainly get irked at the same time
    as other folks consider issues that they just do not realize about.

    You controlled to hit the nail upon the highest and also
    defined out the entire thing with no need side-effects , people can take a signal.

    Will likely be again to get more. Thanks

  39. What’s up to all, how is everything, I think every one is getting more from this website,
    and your views are nice in support of new visitors.

  41. Simply wish to say your article is as astonishing. The clarity on your publish
    is just great and i could think you’re an expert in this subject.
    Fine together with your permission allow me to clutch your
    feed to stay up to date with approaching post.
    Thank you 1,000,000 and please carry on the rewarding
    work.

  44. Hello, i think that i saw you visited my site so i came to “return the favor”.I am trying to find
    things to improve my website!I suppose its ok to use some of
    your ideas!!

  45. Simply wish to say your article is as amazing. The clearness
    in your post is simply cool and i could assume
    you are an expert on this subject. Well with your permission let me to grab your RSS feed to keep up to date with forthcoming post.
    Thanks a million and please carry on the rewarding work.

  46. What i do not understood is in truth how you’re not actually a
    lot more neatly-favored than you may be right now. You are so intelligent.
    You recognize thus significantly in the case of this topic,
    made me personally imagine it from numerous varied angles.
    Its like women and men aren’t interested unless it’s one thing to
    accomplish with Lady gaga! Your personal stuffs nice.

    At all times handle it up!

  48. I love your blog.. very nice colors & theme. Did you design this website yourself or did
    you hire someone to do it for you? Plz reply as I’m looking to create my own blog and
    would like to find out where u got this from. appreciate it

  49. all the time i used to read smaller content which as well
    clear their motive, and that is also happening with this post
    which I am reading at this place.

Comments are closed.