Posted on by Phil

My Learnings from The Book of Joy

This past summer a good friend of mine bought me a copy of “The Book of Joy.”  In the last year I’d been getting into meditation/spirituality, and his wife had loved it.

While the book isn’t very long, it did take me a long time to read it for the simple reason that there is SO MUCH wisdom sprinkled throughout.   For those that don’t know, this book is basically a summary of a week of conversation between the Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu.  It outlines many of their core philosophies.

There are a ton of great tidbits in this book for anyone with an open mind, and I highly suggest you go buy it if you’re at all curious.

I knew it’d be a worthwhile exercise for my own self to codify some (I can’t stress ‘some’ enough – this book is full of interesting and useful wisdom) of the key lessons that I took away, and thought “why not write them up on that blog I never post to!”

So, here are a few of the lessons I took away:

  • “The purpose of life is to find happiness” – The Dalai Lama says this in the opening part of the week, and I completely agree.  Of course, finding and pursuing happiness are quite different and will lead to divergent outcomes.  As is mentioned later in the book, happiness is a byproduct of generosity, compassion, self love, and a host of other worthy pursuits.  Pursuing it directly usually ends in distraction and a focus on things like fast cars or big boats.
  • Compassion = Happiness – Do you ever have one of those days where you strike up a genuine conversation with a stranger, or get to help out someone in need?  As the book says “If you develop a strong sense of concern for the well-being of others, this will make you happy in the morning, even before coffee.”  This is very true, and you can lean test it by smiling and saying hello to each person you meet with today – I guarantee you’ll notice the change in yourself.  Of course, you can supercharge your effort through generosity.
  • A grateful mind breeds happiness – Having a bad day?  Think of something you’re truly grateful for and focus on it.  Maybe it’s as trivial as how warm your coffee is, or maybe it’s something as important as your health.  Focusing on things we’re grateful for is transformative, and a worthwhile daily practice.
  • We’re all people – This is very related to the compassion point, but I wanted to write down a key consideration made throughout the book around the negative side of personal interactions.  Ever have a boss that is horrible, or have a run in with a bully?  Realistically, these people are critical because they see the world as critical, or aggressive because they are fragile.  Forgiveness and empathy, even to people who “don’t deserve it” leads to happiness.  Side note: I’ll admit it, I can hold grudges…but letting them go feels so much better than ruminating (with the exception of when I’m trying to beat a 3 mile time and need some extra adrenaline for that final push).
  • Stress and hardship are just a part of life – According to the book, stress is actually key to our development in utero (disclaimer:  I’m no doctor).  We can all agree that it’d be crazy not to recognize the amazing role that hardship and failure play in the evolution of us as individuals.  So, try to see the bright side of your next challenge, and realize that every human on earth has to go through something similar in their lives (easier said that done!).  Apparently, the first noble truth of Buddhism is that life is full of suffering.  If you need some extra inspiration here, I highly recommend Viktor Frankel’s Man’s Search for Meaning.
  • It ain’t all fluff  – A lot of the above sounds like something a non analytical thinker would believe in, or what you may simply learn at Kindergarten (and what’s wrong with that???).  However, nothing could be further from the truth.  Following the teachings laid out in this book will actually make you happier, allow you to think clearer, and live a more “productive” life.  Beyond my own experience,  you can see that these teachings align with how humans came to be through the evolution of our species.  For example, building meaningful relationships with others is a sure fire way to be happy, which makes sense as that’s how we used to (and still do) get stuff done in society.  In fact, the book is sprinkled with actual scientific studies that detail things like lowered hypertension in people who gave away money…just in case you’re a skeptic and need some data along with the wise words 🙂

One fun thought experiment is to think about the various things future generations will know as truth that we can’t see right now.  For example, we now look back at history and think “how could they not know smoking was bad for them?” or “how could anyone not see the CDO market was a house of cards that posed a major systemic risk to the economy?”  Meditation is a great way to think more clearly about the question of what we just aren’t understanding now…and, perhaps its future adoption will be another answer to this thought experiment.

8,699 Replies to “My Learnings from The Book of Joy”

  4. Write more, thats all I have to say. Literally, it seems as though you relied on the video to make your point.
    You clearly know what youre talking about, why throw away your intelligence on just posting
    videos to your site when you could be giving us something informative to read?

  5. Hey there! This is kind of off topic but I need some advice from
    an established blog. Is it hard to set up your own blog? I’m not
    very techincal but I can figure things out pretty quick.
    I’m thinking about making my own but I’m not sure where
    to start. Do you have any tips or suggestions? Appreciate it

  7. I am curious to find out what blog system you’re working with?
    I’m experiencing some small security problems with my latest site
    and I’d like to find something more risk-free. Do you
    have any recommendations?

  10. Ahaa, its pleasant dialogue regarding this article here at this weblog,
    I have read all that, so at this time me also
    commenting at this place.

  12. We’re a gaggle of volunteers and opening a brand new scheme in our
    community. Your site provided us with helpful information to
    work on. You’ve done an impressive activity and
    our whole community can be thankful to you.

  14. Hey There. I found your blog the usage of msn. This is a very smartly written article.
    I’ll be sure to bookmark it and return to learn extra of your
    helpful info. Thank you for the post. I’ll definitely comeback.

  22. I blog quite often and I genuinely thank you
    for your information. This great article has really peaked my interest.
    I will bookmark your blog and keep checking for new information about once per week.
    I subscribed to your Feed as well.

  23. I was very happy to find this site. I need to to thank you for ones time for this particularly fantastic read!!
    I definitely loved every part of it and I have you bookmarked to check out new stuff on your
    website.

  24. Hey! I could have sworn I’ve been to this website before
    but after browsing through some of the post I realized it’s new to me.
    Anyways, I’m definitely delighted I found it and I’ll be book-marking
    and checking back often!

  25. Hey there would you mind letting me know which webhost you’re working with?
    I’ve loaded your blog in 3 different browsers and I must say this blog loads a lot
    quicker then most. Can you recommend a good internet hosting provider at a
    fair price? Many thanks, I appreciate it!

  29. Terrific article! That is the kind of info that are meant to be
    shared around the web. Disgrace on the search engines for no longer
    positioning this publish upper! Come on over and consult with my site .
    Thank you =)

  30. I am really loving the theme/design of your blog.

    Do you ever run into any web browser compatibility problems?

    A few of my blog readers have complained about my website not
    operating correctly in Explorer but looks great in Opera.
    Do you have any tips to help fix this issue?

  32. First off I want to say great blog! I had a quick question which I’d like
    to ask if you do not mind. I was interested to know how you center
    yourself and clear your thoughts before writing. I have had a hard time clearing my thoughts in getting my ideas out.
    I do enjoy writing however it just seems like the first 10 to 15 minutes are generally wasted
    simply just trying to figure out how to begin. Any ideas or hints?
    Appreciate it!

  33. whoah this blog is great i like reading your posts. Keep up the good work!

    You recognize, a lot of people are looking around for this information, you could aid them greatly.

  34. Write more, thats all I have to say. Literally, it seems as
    though you relied on the video to make your point. You obviously know what youre talking about, why
    waste your intelligence on just posting videos to your blog when you
    could be giving us something enlightening to read?

  36. Hmm is anyone else having problems with the images on this blog loading?

    I’m trying to determine if its a problem on my end or if it’s the blog.
    Any feed-back would be greatly appreciated.

  38. Hello there, I found your blog via Google while searching for a comparable subject, your web site came up, it looks great.
    I’ve bookmarked it in my google bookmarks.
    Hello there, just become alert to your blog through Google,
    and found that it is really informative. I’m gonna watch out for brussels.

    I’ll appreciate if you continue this {in future}.

    Lots of other folks shall be benefited out of your writing.

    Cheers!

  39. Right now it sounds like Movable Type is the preferred blogging platform available right now.

    (from what I’ve read) Is that what you are using on your blog?

  40. Good way of describing, and fastidious article to get
    facts about my presentation focus, which i am going to present
    in institution of higher education.

  41. Hey! Quick question that’s completely off topic. Do you know how to make your site mobile friendly?
    My website looks weird when viewing from my iphone 4.
    I’m trying to find a theme or plugin that might be able to fix this problem.
    If you have any recommendations, please share.
    Cheers!

  42. Attractive section of content. I just stumbled upon your website and in accession capital
    to assert that I acquire in fact enjoyed account your blog posts.
    Anyway I will be subscribing to your augment and even I achievement you access consistently fast.

  49. Pretty section of content. I just stumbled upon your blog
    and in accession capital to assert that I acquire in fact enjoyed
    account your blog posts. Any way I’ll be subscribing to your augment
    and even I achievement you access consistently rapidly.

  50. Yesterday, while I was at work, my cousin stole my iphone and tested to see if it can survive a
    twenty five foot drop, just so she can be a youtube sensation.
    My apple ipad is now broken and she has 83 views.

    I know this is totally off topic but I had to share it
    with someone!

Comments are closed.